Wm. Farrant admits that he is a hockey fanatic. And he's okay with that.

I am a man. I like sports. And I have a lot of time on my hands recently. This evening B-Unit and I watched all four playoff hockey games. It’s probably not the last time we’ll do this. I have a complex ranking system on what teams I will cheer for. And this it:

1. Vancouver – This is the team I live closest to. Therefore, I support the local sports team.

2. Ottawa – This is the only other city I have lived in. They are my back-up local sports team. Also, no one likes the Senators in Ottawa; they all seem to like the Leafs or Canadians.

3. Chicago – My grandfather played for them in the 1930s- one game mind you, but it still counts.

4. Carolina – My childhood team was Hartford. It was all about the jerseys. Carolina’s don’t do it for me. That said, I still root for them. When they won the Stanley Cup I wore both my Whaler jerseys out in public.

5. Montreal – I like when they say “Le But.” It’s kind of cool to cheer for the Habs too.

6. Edmonton – Gretzky hangover thing- note: my spell-check recognizes the word “Gretzky.”

7. Calgary – I’ve tried to like them more but can’t. As far as Canada goes though, I like them more than Toronto.

8. Boston – I like talking with a Boston accent. And, of course, number four, Bobby Orr.

9. Detroit – My Dad’s favourite team. And see #30.

10. Rangers – My Grandfather and Grandmother were at the post-party Stanley Cup celebrations when they won it in 1940. Not much of a reason. But I don’t care.

11. Islanders – They had a good dynasty for a while and have an old arena.

12. Pittsburgh – A Lemieux hangover thing- note: my spell-check does not recognize the word “Lemieux.”

13. Washington – I remember watching that Islanders Capitals overtime game when I was young. And Rod Langway because he was born in Taiwan.

14. St. Louis – As a musician, you have to like their jerseys.

15. Buffalo – Because I’ve been there and it’s the ugliest city ever. Plus, they played in the Aud and their announcer guy really knows how to make a “goal call.”

16. Colorado – Think “Nordiques.”

17. Phoenix – And remember the Jets.

18. New Jersey – No reason. I just hate all the other teams more.

19. Philadelphia – Same as #18 but their uniforms are worse than New Jersey- personal opinion, obv.

20. Los Angeles – They had good uniforms once. And, well, it’s L.A.

21. Minnesota – Kind of close to Canada?

22. Dallas – See #21 for a historical connection.

23. San Jose – Sounds Mexican.

24. Anaheim – They made a movie out of this team. Though, I think Cowee Pearwee is alright.

25. Nashville, Columbus, Florida, Atlanta, Tampa – Hockey does not belong in these places.

30. Toronto – This team wouldn’t pay my Grandfather’s medical bills when he broke his nose in pre-season. A long story follows. They didn’t sign him. Bunch of jerks. A family hatred of the Leafs ensued, and continues. I would be willing to break the rule if they were in the final against the teams ranked below 20- it’s a Canada thing.